hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
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side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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