Sry I called you an 8
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
