How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
