also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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