Well douche your snatch and let's go!
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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