he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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