My girlfriend figured out who you are.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
