why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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