Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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