arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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