Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
