best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
