Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize