I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
