Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize