Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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