Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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