i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize