Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
