i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Randomize
