are you so shy because you have an std?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
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his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
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i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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