this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
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There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
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He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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