he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
