I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
