Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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