I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
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I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
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I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
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