the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize
