we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize
