Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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