Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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