Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
