Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
