i don't plan on having that self control this summer
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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