in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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