There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize