Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
