Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Randomize
