Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize