? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
