High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
