just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
