He called his prostate his "boner button".
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
