Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
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