Buhtt sex?
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
