so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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