We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
