Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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