so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize