roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
