i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
